I wasn't sure where exactly to put this, but I figured the Gifts & Flowers section would suffice, since I didn't see a Wedding section. It seems the cost of weddings and everything related to them has been steadily rising over the years, so I wanted to post about my neighbor's wedding. Both parties have been married before...she's actually been married several times, and he's been married at least one time before, and they have grown children. They're not looking to rack up a bunch of debt with their wedding, so they have decided to have a very simple ceremony down at our neighborhood beach. Since this is a small neighborhood, it wasn't hard for them to get permission for the celebration, and the area has been roped off to keep outsiders from setting up their blankets and other beach equipment. There is no cost involved for using the beach for the ceremony. Someone in the neighborhood is a pastor, and will be performing the service as his gift to the couple. Since it's a beach wedding, it's going to be a very laid back celebration, so there's no need for expensive attire on the part of the bride and groom or the guests. My neighbor's friends here in the neighborhood are 'catering' the event via barbecue, which they do for every such occasion here in our community, which is their contribution to the couple. Some of us are contributing desserts and side dishes, and a woman here in the area decorates cakes, so she's supplying the wedding cake, which will be more of a simple design than the typical multi-tiered wedding cake. We've also got a few hair stylists here in the area, and one of them is handling the bride's hair and makeup. As a result of these collaborative efforts and offerings, the cost of the ceremony will be negligible. I like the idea of having a simple ceremony and not going into debt, and it's nice to see so many who live here in our community pitching in to make the occasion festive. The groom and his friends all grew up here in this community, and for the most part, it's a tight group of multi-generational families, so they're more like an extended family than just neighbors.
Weddings don't need to be expensive. All that matters is for the couple to make the day memorable. And there are many ways to get that without spending too much money. In any case as there's no guarantee that you'll be living happily ever after with your SO, there'd be no need to spend too much money on the wedding and a few years later you are divorcing. All the money spent would have been wasted and you'll both regret it.
I have been attending weddings in the past year and I will stand as one of the sponsors on June 11 for the wedding of a relative. Weddings now are so extravagant. Video coverage is a must and there is even the pre-nup video that is to be shown during the reception. I am always overwhelmed upon learning of the cost of those weddings that run up to millions of pesos (at least $10k). If I would be the wedding coordinator, maybe I could chop down to cost to half of the usual..
I think the wedding is such a show these days with everyone trying to make their wedding bigger and better than the last person. I like the idea of a low cost family type of affair.
@Corzhens You wouldn't believe how much some of the ones here cost, it's truly ridiculous. It's now an 'industry', and has gotten really out of control. I have never wanted a large one. Even standing up for my sister was nerve wracking, although that probably related to the person she was marrying even more than the idea of standing up in front of 200+ people and speaking. I really like the idea of something down to earth and simple, with just a few close loved ones, rather than all that pomp and circumstance. There are quite a few shows on television here just about selecting the dress, which is really crazy.
@Diane Lane, weddings now are becoming a sort of a show off. Brides desire the most expensive dress by a noted dressmaker and the reception is in hotel restaurants. By the way, the tradition in the Philippines on weddings expenses is it is usually shouldered by the groom. That's why the bride has the temerity to show her caprice. There is a place here called Divisoria, right in the heart of Manila. It is a commercial center where everything is cheap, from bridal gowns to wedding giveaways. It is incredible that the cost of a bridal gown very similar to branded gowns are not even 10% of the original. And who would know if you are wearing a branded or an imitation? It's really sad that weddings now are getting exorbitant and extravagant. Worse, the invitation would fool you by 1 hour, meaning 3pm is indicated but the actual ceremony starts at 4pm. That's how incredulous wedding are now.. courtesy of the so called wedding planners.
I like the inexpensive yet very wonderful marriage plans because everyone is involved and wants to be part of the wedding. I too like a very simple and inexpensive wedding when I get married. I dream and go window shopping to check how much weddings are locally, who to invite and flowers or no flowers wedding are some of the things that's fun to window shop for. One other thing to window shop for is a wedding dress or gown and all the bling, shoes and other accessories to shop for. The marriage and anniversaries are important as well as the wedding.
I would prefer a simple wedding as well. We only got married via a judge and I'm still dreaming about a church wedding. But it's not an extravagant wedding that I'm dreaming of, something very simple. Maybe just a chapel, with some of our closest relatives. The reception would have to be just in a garden only. And that's enough for me. A beach wedding would be nice as well but I doubt that my in-laws would allow that, they're very old-fashioned. I'd also prefer a simple gown, not something designed by a popular designer. Just something that fits me and I would look nice on. Then, maybe the colour motif would be pink and white. I won't require coats for the men, maybe just a polo shirt. I'd love for my son to be the ring bearer as well. But I'd like it to be personalised. I'd love for us to make the invitations. The signs at the wedding would have to be hand-painted. That's about it really. I think simple weddings stand out more.
Wow, Diane, I think that is fantastic. How nice that everyone comes together and helps a young couple starting out. I hate the idea of going into debt when couples are just starting out. It makes zero sense to me to spend that extravagantly for something that will come and go so quickly. I mean, yeah, it should be lovely and memorable, but I don't think breaking the bank makes for good memories. There are lots of ways to find savings for a wedding and still make it nice. I've seen some pretty elaborate affairs. I know a couple who got married when we were young, and they never really recovered from the debt. That's just sad. Some weddings are so expensive that the amount of money could have been used as a hefty down payment on a house! If it were me, I'd rather buy the house and have a lower key wedding.
Great thread! I'm currently helping my sister plan her wedding and they want to do things inexpensively. I did the same when I got married, I encourage all couples to find creative ways to save on the wedding and make sure they take a honeymoon! Mine was some of the best memories of my life and I know too many couples who go broke on the wedding and end up postponing their honeymoon for another day, sometimes that day never comes! It's very easy to be creative with food, decorations, and location and save a ton on wedding expenses! It's often more memorable to do things this way also since you can really use your own personality in what you plan.
Look around little places outskirts, other people's yards, etc. See if people will let you take some flowers from their garden and just go door to door instead of spending $, most people love contributing to weddings. Be humble with your food choices, chefs over ingredients type of thing.
It’s entirely possible to organize a meaningful wedding complete with all the needed amenities without having to dig deep into your wallet. You just have to be smart about where you buy your supplies. Keep in mind that most people can’t see the difference between a $100 dollar wedding dress and one that costs $2000.
Where I come from, there is a legal provision for a civil wedding under the auspices of the local administration. All that a couple that wants to wed are required to do is to show up at the District Commissioner's office. Upon payment of a modest sum of around $25, a short marriage ceremony is conducted by a priest in the prescence of both parents. Then the wedding certificate is signed and all is in order.
