Would You Forgo Tipping Just To Save Money?

The American mentality is to look like a good tipper. I have a well off Jewish friend who tips 10% only and that's her. She told me you don't tip on take out unless they deliver, but then tips are expected but not compulsory.

People do go out when they are short on funds for an occasion because it's called being social. I know when friends are short on funds a fixed price buffet is often a good idea or a fixed price menu is decided beforehand and some better off friends help make up the difference in the service charge. People should not feel as if they cannot go out ever because of funds and to fear the tips. I do feel the American mentality is flawed, because I know the server doesn't really care and just wants tips, so if they fake it, why should I fake it and give them a good tip for bringing me a beer? It's a faux game, but a server that goes out of their way to help will get a good tip.

Personally I don't care if I look like a 'bad' customer because I didn't tip generously, why should you? If they give you bad service after that because of it, it shows what a poor place it was any how.

 

I almost wish that I lived in America or Canada, just so I could show people just how many fucks I don't give by not tipping. Peer pressure has never really worked with me. And then I'd start a revolution, and make it so that these fuck bags who were paying these people, upped the wages. You cannot expect people to work all the hours that God sends, and get near enough nothing in return. so much that there is a social custom that customers have to pick up the slack. Like, what the fuck is that? lol.

 

Let me give you an example of the mentality of 'looking good' and then being broke. I have a friend who does seasonal work and he gets $50 a day plus tips as a guide. So when he goes for a beer or pizza because he likes to be sociable he tips generously, but then is left with no money to buy toilet roll or cat food and takes to social media asking people to lend him money until he is paid. Is that sensible or right? His job does entail being social so he can network and find other jobs, but at what cost?

His preoccupation with looking like a good tipper is all a pretense because he ends up having to lend money or others have to pay for him. As a guide he does get some good tips, but they are not guaranteed and they shouldn't be either. Incidentally I met him as I took his tour and I did tip him, but because others hadn't and I knew it was his last week of seasonal work.

 

I just bypass the whole ordeal and do the social thing in every other way lol. I hate the whole restaurant industry and the tipping game and I don't like how people celebrate with food.. I find it odd, expensive and pointless at this point in my life (not to mention, I worship my health too much to eat their food anyway lol). There are much better, more fun ways to spend your time with people, so I just don't.

I was raised in a place that tipping is mandatory (unspoken) and although I couldn't care less if the average joe thought I was a cheapskate, I do care if certain people in my life do and I would also leave that restaurant feeling horrible for the waitress if she wasn't given a tip she very much needs because of the unfair industry shenanigans.. I'm actually an over-tipper because of that lol. I can't afford to pay everyone's wages because I feel bad for them, so again, I just won't go.

 

It is terrible. People in other occupations barely make enough money to survive also, and are expected to tip and tip well. If they don't they are cheapskates or terrible tippers, when they may be in just as much financial need as those that work in the server business. If you want to tip, I feel you should. If you are happy to tip, i feel one should. The pressure aspect of it is what gets my goat, and the sheer entitlement of the mentality.

 

Absolutely agree. I know many people consider going out to dinner to be the get together norm / romantic / fun / necessary even and I find it extremely unfair that no matter your finances, you are expected to tip. You're literally withholding a small portion of someone's income and if enough people feel as you do, they could be without basic needs. I just think everything needs to be rebuilt. Everyone deserves a living wage.. this suffering because of money thing is revolting and completely unnecessary.

 

It is so unnecessary!! I can't believe that they are able to turn people against one another though, all over this tool called money. It sucks and really gets my goat. You can't expect people to spend precious minutes of their life - most of the time doing shit that they don't even want to do - and not be able to live comfortably after it. It is very depressing!! I cannot wait for the establishment to fall

 

Well said @sidney . In America the individualistic belief is a bit of a farce because people get into debt, and work several jobs to make ends meet. Businesses are out to profit and be part of the American dream, but in those old days it was achieved used immigrant labor. Not much has changed which is why people will use illegals because they will work for peanuts and not complain.

 

I'm with you.. unfortunately, the same ol' tactics will be used to "remedy" issues. North America is a circus of willing slavery and everyone looks at each other instead of where their ire belongs. I see it all year, people bitching about jobs, education, wages, services etc etc etc.. then come election time, they pick a fave of a bunch of fools that will send them spinning in the same circles they've been bitching about, like it will do any good at all. Government will never change or help us, but everyone is so stuck in "it's how it's always been done" that they don't realize real change comes from all of us.. not them.. or "voting" (lol I like how people think they've got a choice).

 

I don't avoid tipping just to save money. I think there are other ways that i can do to save. Giving tips is like showing you appreciate the service they are giving. In other countries it is mandatory. But in my country it is not. It's up to you if you want to give or not. Personally,I always give because I know the feeling if someone appreciates your work.

 

I guess I see it differently because I was a server at one point. From my point of view, everyone deserves "average" service - a table that is clean, food that is on time, hot, and cooked correctly, drinks that are refilled when they're empty, a polite professional demeanor from the server. I expect those things and will complain if a server is rude or the food is incorrect.

On the other hand, I don't expect someone to go above and beyond for me without some incentive. At my favorite local diner, if you compare the service I get to someone who is known by the servers not to tip well, there's a distinct difference. We both get refills...but mine will be faster and before I ask. My plates will be cleared away faster. The server will take my check up herself instead of having me pay on my way out (their usual method). I'll always be seated somewhere with a plug for my laptop...and no one will tell me to unplug it.

I won't argue about whether it's right or wrong. I will say that the difference exists, especially in places that you go regularly enough that the staff recognizes you. It is a self-perpetuating cycle. After they know how you tip, they treat you accordingly...which means typically that good tippers keep giving good tips because they know they get extra perks and poor tippers use average service as an excuse to keep tipping poorly. I don't typically care what people dining with me think; most of the time I eat out, I do it alone.

 

If I cannot afford the meal and the tip, I will not go out to eat. Let's be honest, if you can afford to go out to eat, then you can afford to leave something as a tip. As a former server who was paid $2.65 per hour by a large, national chain restaurant, I relied on my tips as income. Of course, it was my choice to work as a server, and I found that the tips paid well compared to other jobs (such as retail) that I could get while working around my college class schedule. Working as a server helped me pay my way through college. There were definitely times as a server that I felt underappreciated, by both my employer and the customers, but I always gave the level of service I would expect to receive while eating out. For those of you going out to eat in the US, please tip your servers!

 

Back when I was a server, I could sympathize with someone who ordered something fairly cheap, was a nice/easy customer, tipped a little but not great, and then left the table so it could be used again. We've all been short on cash and still wanted a sit down meal instead of fast food.

The people I became unhappy with did one or many of these things:

• Ordered the most expensive thing on the menu...and then didn't tip well or tip anything. Most restaurant have a range of prices. I know I personally chose restaurant and food items based on how much I want to spend...and I consider a fair tip as part of that calculation.
• Were super demanding or high maintenance guests...and then didn't tip well for the extra service. In my mind, average service = average tip. If you're running the server ragged with special requests and she's complying cheerfully, that's more than average service.
• Ordered coffee or soda and then sat for extended periods of time drinking the free refills, which blocked potential tipping customers from getting the table. (note: it doesn't matter how many tables are in the restaurant. often a server's 'section' is only 4-10 tables and the hostess counts how many are filled before seating the next guest to keep things fair so someone sitting for an extended period of time messes that up). If the person doing this doesn't tip REALLY well, they can really screw up a server's earnings for a whole night. Some restaurants have policies to discourage it but it's a common problem in diners or 24-hour places.

 

The thing is is if you are in a cafe and order a coffee and a slice of cake or a muffin on a plate, really the server is bringing a cup and a plate to your table and that's it. So how much do you tip? If they give you shoddy service because they think you won't tip well, would you return? No, so you don't get repeat custom and a bad reputation.

I just think the psychology of servers is flawed (in the US) because sometimes I just want to talk to my friend and we just order, get our food and want to be left alone. Unlike many American patrons, not all people need fussing over with refills. When I used to hostess at events, I would go the extra mile because it was my job. When they were about to close the free bar, I quickly made up another jar of Pimm's and gave it a table of younger clients (less money) as last orders had gone. They didn't realize the bar had closed and thanked me. As I left, 10 minutes later one of them chased me and gave me $100 when they realized what I had done. I didn't do it for the tip, I did it because I cared enough to do my job. I didn't expect a tip (and the others didn't think they could afford to tip) because, tips are an extra and not to be relied up and don't reflect how good you are either, it just depends how much money that client has to spare or to throw around.

 

Tipping $1 is better than not tipping at all, and I would not personally look down on a customer for doing so. It really depends on the type of customer they are, as mentioned by @Feneth. Super high demanding customers who take extra time away from my other customers due to their extra requests and then do not tip, hurt the amount of money I could be making if I did not need to spend extra time catering to their needs. Friendly regular customers whose needs are average who tip $1 I would not have a big problem with.

 

I have seen many youtube videos, from people who work or have previously worked in the server/catering industry, and they have made videos specifically about the topic of tipping enough, and people not tipping enough. And I can say that the general consensus seems to be that $1 is just not enough, and that even five dollars is low, which the entitlement in that statement really turned me off.